Random Thoughts and Ramblings

I thought that being well-informed was enough. I couldn't be more wrong.  2020 has bombarded all of us with constant repetition of similar tensions and awful news without mercy, a few of those happened this week and I felt the necessity to put my response in writing. My heart ached after the House of Representatives decided to withdraw the plan to further discuss the vital sexual bill (RUU PKS) this year, saying that it is "difficult". I attempted to decipher the reasoning behind such decision, so I drowned myself in a sea of debates on the issue. What I found from the opposing standpoint was the lack of coherence in the arguments that they seem to have been oversimplified. Each rebuttal has been either based on prejudice, misinformation, or lack of knowledge — political motives might have played along but I will not have a preconceived idea about this matter. Some political parties have argued that the bill supports the affirmation of the acts of adultery and non...

Sebagian orang mungkin merasa bahwa physical distancing selama beberapa bulan ini membawa dampak positif dalam beberapa aspek kehidupan, mulai dari kepekaan diri untuk melihat dan memilah tentang apa yang penting, pengembangan potensi pribadi, sampai penemuan identitas diri. Upaya physical distancing dilakukan secara kolektif, memunculkan naluri untuk saling mendukung dan menguatkan satu sama lain. Salah satunya adalah perbaikan komunikasi dengan orang-orang terdekat. Bekerja dari rumah memungkinkan kita untuk berbincang lebih banyak dengan keluarga sembari makan malam, tanpa harus kesepian menerjang kemacetan Ibu Kota. Komunikasi dengan keluarga dan kerabat yang jauh pun terasa dekat dengan berbagai teknologi yang tersedia. Tidak sedikit orang yang lebih produktif dibandingkan sebelumnya, ketika dihalangi oleh kesibukan dari yang memang perlu hingga yang semu. Saya merasa bersyukur menjadi bagian dari yang merasakan dampak positif tersebut. Saya masih bisa berkumpul dengan keluarg...

There was a phase in my life where I could listen to The Smiths endlessly. Their songs made me feel all sorts of inexplicably profound and deep feelings, and they still do. From the comically sweet but tragic "There's a Light That Never Goes Out", the desperate yet hopeful "Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want", to the darkly soothing "sing me to sleep, don't try to wake me" lyrics of "Asleep". Just like our erratic emotions, their songs are rife with inner-turmoil and never sharply defined. Then I heard the news of Morrissey's controversial views on race and religion, apparently for the umpteenth time, and it broke my heart. He called Chinese a subspecies and he quoted "halal slaughter requires certification that can only be given by supporters of ISIS". A little bit closer to the life as I know it, I have such a respect-loathe relationship with Ahmad Dhani. (You guys with me?!) The man behind such admirable...

COVID-19 has caused so much misery to a lot of people and I won't start to list them otherwise I'll cry in despair, longing for everything to be like it used to really really soon. At times, it leaves me in a perpetual state of tedium, bewilderment and desperation that I wish all this was merely a very long nightmare and everything would be right in its place in the morning. I bet I'm not alone, a lot of people must feel a sense of anxiousness and hopelessness in these strange times too. Yet, social distancing has brought to me several heartening consequences I rarely thought existed before. These are a few: The existence of physical distance does not equate to the existence of emotional distance We are forced to commit to a bunch of LDRs with a lot of people; may that be with our significant other, friends, or colleagues. The thought of being only a few minutes away from someone yet unable to meet them is so new and heartbreaking. But, thanks to those state-of-the-...

I've been fortunate enough to have had the opportunity to study abroad, go on exchange, and change jobs. I've met different circles of friends with opposing personalities and views in life, and obtained a series of experiences that have shaped me into the person I am today. a 15-year old me wouldn't have thought that these millions of obscure yet valuable adversities and fortunes could be thrown at me. You bump into a stranger, become friends in a split second, share each other's stories and instantly become best friends. Then, you both get busy with school/work/whatever is going on in your life, you try to meet or v-call once in a while until you both slowly drift apart and no longer see each other. You are back to square one, strangers to each other. I don't know if you've been in a similar situation before, but I have, multiple times. At first it saddens you, it's so hard that you refuse to accept the truth. Yet, it strikes you from time to time...

Aku ingin menenggak habis kopinya segera Menggiring segar pada pagi kabut Kau ingin menyeruputnya pelan Menghirup satu demi satu aroma citrus, karamel dan nektar Aku takut didih air menguap jadi dingin Pahitnya kian terasa, terasa jadi hambar Kau takut panasnya hanguskan lidah Dan kita kelu tak sanggup bicara Untuk kesekian kalinya kita terbentur pada hal serupa Entah kamus hilang ke mana, kalah dan mengalah dianggap sama Lalu kita tiba di satu titik pendar yang menyentil gusar Kita sama-sama tau yang kita tak mau: kata teranulir, kita tinggal raga Mungkin tak perlu tergesa-gesa Yang dinanti akhirnya akan datang Sadarku Mungkin tak perlu menunggu Yang dinanti terkadang harus dikejar Jawabmu

Not too long ago people said something along the lines of "it's not common to go to a psychologist", or "that girl went to a psychologist, she must be crazy!". There was a somewhat major misconception of people going to therapy. The stigma was so big that my dream of becoming a psychologist kinda shattered after college (I guess I thought I needed money to survive :p). Well, the nagging self-doubt slowly but surely crippled my capability to become one too.  Yet, we are now in a brand new public sphere after just a few years. It’s perfectly acceptable to say that you’re mentally ill, depressed, or plainly sad. "It’s okay to not be okay", so the saying goes. Everyone divulges their so-called oddities, or to a greater extreme, abnormalities. By everyone I mean your friends, colleagues, and even those celebrities/actors/actresses/celebgrams that seem utterly content and happy. So why shouldn’t you?  It's funny that we're going in the reve...